Kaku's Turn
by max3833
Summary: Kaku hates guard duty. Kaku and Robin friendship/dislike/whatever you would like to interpret it as.


Disclaimer: I do not own One Piece, or any other crossover I put in here. I only one the lines and plot I personally make up.

Kaku's Turn

If there was anything Kaku, member of the CP9, hated, it was doing guard duty. It was a particular pain at the current moment, as he still had to keep up the guise of the lovable, if not somewhat insane, fifth foreman. He was almost sad that Nico Robin had actually come; he really did love being a ship Wright.

Of course, he would never tell any of his colleagues this. Spandex, as he loved to secretly call his boss, would flip at him, and threaten to fire him. That of course was never an actual option, Spandem didn't have that kind of power, and Kaku knew he was too valuable to the government to be fired.

It was the others that actually worried him. Fukuro would go blabbing to the rest of them, and that would doom him to face the others.

First, Kumadori would jump and yell at him. The giant would lament at Kaku's dishonor, then say that he had given dishonor to himself, attempt to kill himself, and then stop at the last second. Really, the whole routine had been funny the first thousand times, but now it was incredibly annoying.

Kalifa would then accuse him of being ignorant, and then somehow accuse him of sexual harassment. Darn new age feminism.

Bleuno would just stare at him with those dark sullen eyes, giving him the creeps every second that they were together. Of course, he did that anyway, so it really wouldn't matter.

Jyabura would laugh at him for being light hearted and weak. The wolf man would get several of teasing out of that one joke. It was actually very annoying. Particularly since he was pretty sure he could beat that old hound to the ground any day of the week.

And finally, Lucci would just look at him for a second, sip a cup of coffee, and disappear for a few seconds. Then, when Kaku would finally realize that Lucci was actually right behind him, he would already have a knife in his back, and be dying a slow and painful death on the floor. Yeah, that is not the way he would like to go. Thank you very much!

So, he was left to brood while he sat in the same room as the wanted woman. He took this moment to look over the infamous Nico Robin.

Nico Robin was tall, taller than himself, and as such seemed to tower over you when you looked at her. She was, for lack of a better term, beautiful, though again, he could never voice these opinions or else risk death and mockery.

The only other obvious part about her was that she was not acting in a way that you would expect a major criminal such as herself to act. Instead of secretly plotting an escape, or violently attempting to escape, she was simply sitting there, reading her book.

"What are you reading?" he asked accidentally. He really didn't care; he just was bored out of his mind. Besides, it might give him some idea of how much she knew about the weapon Pluton.

He listened intently for a response, and was stunned at the silence. He looked at her, and she was still intently staring into the book. She must have not heard him; surely she would not ignore a question from her captor.

"I asked you, what are you reading?" he said again mildly more forcefully. He was shocked when all she did not react to his question at all. All she did was turn the page of her book and continue reading.

"What the hell," Kaku cursed under his breath, "I asked you a question!"

One of the main rules of a member of the CP9 is that you do not let emotion control your actions. This rule was mostly ignored as long as said operative was not on a mission, but now Kaku had officially lost control of his anger.

"Listen to me and tell me the name of that book!" he screamed at the wanted woman in front of him.

"Oh sorry, I didn't know you were so interested in it," the mysterious woman finally said. Unlike Kaku's tone, her voice was almost cheerful as she addressed him. She gave him what appeared to be a sincere smile, as she walked up to him.

"Here you go, Mr. Square Nose," she said cheerfully, handing Kaku the book. He ignored the satirical name, as he grabbed the book. It was dusty, so he wiped the dust off the front, allowing him to read the title out loud.

"_How To Get Idiots Angry_," Kaku said in a deadpanned voice. He then turned to the page Robin had opened, and read it out loud as well, "_Chapter Seven: Ignoring Conversation_."

He then heard a small giggle, and turned to see Robin covering her mouth trying to contain her laughter. He then glared at the book.

"That was not very nice," Kaku said now that his emotions back under control.

"I'm not holding you prisoner right now," she said as cheerfully as someone who was staring death in the face could.

"Touché," Kaku admitted, as he leaned back in his chair, "Though my duty to guard you is like a prison warden to me."

"My sympathies."

"Your mocking me again aren't you?" he asked, as she smiled happily again.

"How very perceptive of you," she replied, causing Kaku to glare at her while he returned the book.

As she returned to reading, he sighed. He was still bored, and he hated being bored. He reached into the pocket of his bright orange jacket, rummaging for his recreational project. He was glad he hadn't changed into his assassins outfit yet, or else he would have lost his little dream.

"Ah, there it is," he said, pulling out his model ship. It was small, no more than six inches long. It was well decorated however, crafted to the finest detail. The sails were made from pure cotton, the riggings were all in tact, and even tiny cannons were protruding from the hull of the model.

"What is that?" Robin, turning up from her book, asked. Kaku ignored her, as he began to use a knife carefully to add another cannon to the ship.

"That trick won't work on me you know," Robin said suddenly, causing Kaku to snap his fingers in frustration.

"Can't blame me for trying," he said, as he finally turned his attention to her, "It was my dream ship. I designed it since I was a kid."

"So you wanted to be a shipwright when you were a kid," Robin said, "then this job must have been like a dream for you."

"You have no idea," Kaku said, as he continued to work on his ship. He then smiled and put the ship back in his pocket, "But this will soon be in the past, I might as well enjoy it."

He then leaned out the window, smiling at the darkness that had just set on the sky. The plan would not go into action for several hours still, and this was the perfect opportunity for one last flight through the city. Just as he was about to fling himself from the window, he heard a small cough.

"Wouldn't your comrades be rather upset at you leaving me unguarded?" she asked sweetly, causing his sweat to drop.

"Yes they would," he said, before gaining a smirk, "Criminal, how would you like to have one last thrill ride before you are placed under custody?"

* * *

Robin was not a person who showed emotion that often. It was her claim to fame on the crew, as she was the only one who could remain absolutely calm at any moment while being a member of the Straw Hats. It was actually quite fun to play with their little minds when they over reacted.

So, even she could not understand why she had let herself get roped into roof jumping with the Square Nosed member of the CP9. She had probably been spending too much time with Luffy, and his desire to have fun had over powered her sense of reason.

She could not help but laugh as Kaku suddenly choose to take a long dive down to another level of the city.

Whatever would happen in the next few days, she at least knew she had had fun.

* * *

Author's Note: And that was fun!

I really enjoyed writing a One Piece Fiction this time around. Oda's characters are so fun, that it is hard not to fall in love with the Manga. One character I found particularly intriguing was Kaku, who seemed to be the ultimate anti-villain, or nice guy who was born in the wrong place. I just felt that he might work an interesting dynamic with Robin, as he might be the only one who would not be completely heartless to her.

Tell me if you liked this and if you want me to do more one shots involving Robin, Kaku, and the rest of the Straw hats.


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